Wednesday, December 11, 2024

Riverboat Gambler: Aldrich Deathsbane


By marriage to the Giantess Morwenna, the mercenary Aldrich Brisbane was recently crowned King of the Giants. His bride was immediately killed by a revolutionary from the Hundred Hands, his inlaws and retinue incinerated by an Ancient Red Dragon during the ensuing brawl. Aldrich escaped the wedding massacre, along with subsequent pursuit by the Trade Wardens of Brazenkragg who intended to use him as a political pawn. 

Now he leads a small band of large humanoids on a riverboat cruise, staying one step ahead of his pursuers and stealing everything not nailed down.

ALDRICH DEATHSBANE
Aldrich Brisbane was an insufferable hypocrite, killing and looting as he pleased while yapping about the importance of law and the moral superiority of elder civilizations such as the Dwarves. His death and resurrection during the Tournament of the Giantess Morwenna were an epiphany: the Hammerer, Dwarven God of Divine Justice, was waiting in the Red Hot Room to punish him after death. Bloodfeast, demon God of sacrifice who Cave Elves called the Decapitator, could keep him alive for as possible.

Aldrich swings between drunken hedonism and paranoid fear at the fate waiting for him after death. He's a ruthless and cunning while lucid, anticipating typical adventurer dirty tricks and enacting a few of his own. He fights as a Fighter 5, AC as Chain+1, Attacks Longsword plus Fist of Bronze
  • Architecture: Aldrich has a keen eye for secret doors, hidden traps and construction tricks.
  • Bullying Swagger: By the power of the God King, Aldrich gets a +5 to hit, damage, saves and AC versus beings smaller than himself (Dwarves, Halflings, Gnomes, Goblins, etc). He carries a Potion of Enlarge Person that lets him gain this bonus against normal size people.
  • Came Back Wrong: Aldrich takes damage from Holy Water, and double damage vs blessed or silver weapons. Any magic that works on demons/devils/fiends works on him.
  • Fist of Bronze: In exchange for additional sacrifices, Bloodfeast replaced the arm Aldrich lost at the wedding with a functional metal replica. It grants him either a bonus attack (as dagger) or grab (Save vs Paralysis to avoid) every round.
Besides Enlarge Person, Aldrich carries potions of Cure Critical Wounds and Expeditious Retreat. He keeps his 5,406 SP on his person for fear of thieves.

THE GIANTS
Purebred elemental Giants are rare and suffer problems from inbreeding. The ones who flocked to Aldrich's banner are no exception. They obey his commands while he's in the room and let their impulses rule them when he leaves. They can't help it.


HAKKAPELIITA
Hakkapeliitta the Frost Giant is driven by his cruel instincts, but has a little Horse of Turin moment every time he does something genuinely bad. He follows Aldrich because he can be cruel or kind without having an emotional breakdown. He wears 3,500 SP in silver decorations on his armor and clothing.

EUSEBIA
Eusebia the Cloud Giant is a megalomaniac who believes she controls everything. If her schemes go badly she convinces herself it's all according to plan. She follows Aldrich because someone needs to manipulate him behind the scenes. He makes her wear a suit of plate armor and calls her Morwenna during sex, which she thinks is adorable. She wears 5,000 SP in gold and gems.

KROPP
Kropp the Hill Giant is brutish but cowardly. He wants to fight and win, but catastrophizes at the first setback. He likes Aldrich because the boss makes him feel brave. He doesn't wear any jewelry.

NERVA
Nerva the Storm Giant has trouble initiating action. Like a Parkinsons patient he sits idle, aware of the world but unable to do anything except when compelled by some external force. Aldrich's commands break through the shell, letting him run and leap and toss lightning and dance in the rain. He wears 6,000 SP in gold decorations.

OTILLO
Otillo the Stone Giant suffers from poor impulse control. He wants to mind his own business, but he gives voice to intrusive thoughts or does things that pop into his head without realizing it. He likes Aldrich because the boss' voice distracts him from idle thoughts. He wears jade and turquoise jewelry worth 2,500 SP.

THE CREW
Aldrich has a force of foot troops who fit in places the Giants can't reach. 


SPANAKOPITA AND ISPANAKLI
This pair of Demicyclopses are the brains of the operation, spared the ravages of inbreeding by their mixed parentage. They lead the foot troops, translating Aldrich's random whims into actionable orders for the Landsknechts. When confronted with an unfamiliar situation they strike up a Socratic dialogue with one another, eventually zeroing in on the correct answer. This makes them good at searching for hidden adventurers and seeing through attempts to deceive them, provided they have enough time to figure things out. Solving tactical puzzles is their primary motivation.

Stats as Ogres. While led by the Cyclopskin, the Landsknechts get an extra D4 tacked on to their attack bonus with all weapons. Ispanakli has an Immovable Rod he waves around as an officer's baton, not recognizing it as a magic item and not knowing the command word.

OGRE LANDSKNECHT
Nine Ogres from Morwenna's entourage ended up in Aldrich's gang. They either believed him when he said he didn't kill her, or didn't care as long as he led them to food, drink and treasure.

They fight per the usual Ogre stat block with armor as half-plate. Their large muskets deal 2D6 damage and they're capable of basic skirmish tactics like half the group firing while the other loads, or all firing a volley and then rushing down the target with hand weapons.


STOKKUD CANDLEWEATHERED
Stokkud just wants to brew. He doesn't ask where the reagents come from, he's too drunk to care. He's what the Dwarves idiomatically call a Bladder Bowel Belly, a guy who collaborates with evil. During the reign of the Old King his kind supported the Monarch and became fabulously wealthy trading slaves, especially Cave Elves captured in the Underwars. His clan fell with the Monarchy and he's been lying low ever since, playing the hapless drunk. Stats as Dwarf 3, AC as unarmored, attack as two-handed maul. He carries 1,098 SP and a holy symbol of the Grain Goddess he took off a priest.

ODETTE
Odette was a student wizard with a boring, functional moral compass until Aldrich's crew destroyed the village where she was doing her practicum. Stokkud tricked her into downing a pint laced with Charm Person and "enlisted" her help brewing potions and booze. Stats as Magic User 1, AC as unarmored, can memorize Sleep or Magic Missile.

Odette and Stokkud brew beer for everyone on the ship and potions for Aldrich. They can brew Odette's recipes for Sleep and Protection, plus Stokkud's Dwarven recipes for Healing, Growth, Charm Person and Blindness.


THE SHIP
The Iskanderun is a barge, built to haul grain and other heavy loads. It's big and wide enough to take the weight of five Giants and a dozen Ogres while still maintaining a shallow enough draft to travel the silty river. 

Side-mounted rudders allow for limited steering via the elevated helm, but there's no mast. When moving against the current the Giants use oars and poles to propel the boat, or climb out and pull it with ropes when that isn't enough. The wide, flat vessel is not seaworthy and would quickly be swamped in rough water. Aldrich sleeps in a small cabin under the helm. The Giants and footsoldiers sleep on the deck. The Cyclopskin man the helm except when Aldrich feels like playing captain.

When they attack a settlement they try to get the barge as close as possible to the riverbank without crashing, since rowboats won't hold the Giants. Sometimes they get beached, which requires a lot of frantic shoving if they have to leave in a hurry. After the dust settles, Aldrich sacrifices the highest HD captive to Bloodfeast. The rest are eaten by the Giants. Livestock and fish are fed to the Ogres, crops are used for brewing beer. He steers clear of the busiest channels, where well-protected Iron Cup and Potion Addict ships ply the waters. But fishing villages and grain ships can't sustain his ravenous forces or his appetite for blood sacrifice forever...

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